The BOFH is one of my favourite geek creations. He is the B*****d Operator From Hell who rules the network with an iron hand, several hundred volts of electricity, and the Halon fire prevention system.
I downloaded a whole pile of BOFH excuses for why the computer/network/system/internet isn't working. These are a few for use this week:
Your computer's not working becauseElectromagnetic radiation from satellite debris
Static from nylon underwear
Magnetic interference from money/credit cards
Somebody was calculating pi on the server
Network packets travelling uphill (use a carrier pigeon)
Bad ether in the cables
Secretary plugged hairdryer into UPS
Repeat after me: RTFM (read the manual).
PS. Note use of Hubby's newly discovered <acronym> tag above. Much coolness.